Peas In A Pod Honey Jar Spell (aka, A Magical Clusterfuck Spell For Ailing Families)

In a blog post over at Strategic Sorcery Jason Miller describes a house cleansing working he undertook and articulates that the whole operation, for those coming from either a Christian or Buddhist background, would appear to be a clusterfuck (original post here). While I respect Jason and his work, you should know that you will never get a similitude of a clusterfuck here.  Here, you will get the real thing! While I have no qualms performing clusterfuck magick, I do my damndest to avoid allowing my magick to slip into being a chicken-goat-fuck.* Now, for those of you who know not the dreaded “chicken-goat-fuck,” this cursed event has been defined as:

A chicken goat fuck is a situation so hopelessly chaotic that you can only sit back and laugh (or weep, depending on your sensibilities). It's identical to a clusterfuck except in terms of scale; a chicken goat fuck is what you've got when a clusterfuck goes bad.(CGF source)

So, I take pride in my magical clusterfucks. While indeed clusterfucks, they are (I hope) clusterfucks with style and efficacy.

For those of you who are into clusterfuck magick or who feel that they can learn something from clusterfuck magick, I will present a recently created magickal clusterfuck spell below. Before doing so, however, I must first set the stage for my operation by talking briefly about families. Sometimes, family members do not get along. Sometimes, they do not get along even when love is shared between them. Sometimes, the bad days can outnumber the good and chip away at the love that remains. I know this because that family is my family. For whatever reason, my family has entered into the “dark night of the soul.” In fact, we have been there for some time. While there is recognition of this fact among all members of my family, we have been unsuccessful in remedying the situation. So, being the magician that I hope one day to be, I thought our situation calls for some magical sweetening. To sweeten our relationships with one another I chose to create a spell based upon an adaptation of a Hoodoo honey jar spell. While honey jar spells are traditionally utilized to bring forth a lover, my adaptation is designed to foster the enhancement of loving-kindness between members of my family. So, without delay here is how I perform a Peas In A Pod Honey Jar Spell (aka, A Magical Clusterfuck Spell For Ailing Families).

Essential Material:

Glass jar with lid

Enough honey to fill jar

uncooked peas (one for each family member…yourself included)

toothpicks

Green thread

Green permanent marker or paint

Permanent markers or paints the color of which corresponds to the astrological color of each family member.

A sweet/ flowery smelling tealight candle

Non-essential/optional material:

These items can be anything you choose that will enhance your working and give the spell some added oomph.

Spell Preparation:

Pea Preparation:

Take one uncooked pea for each family member and pierce it with a toothpick and set somewhere to dry.

Once the peas are dry, remove the toothpicks and place a pea under each family member’s mattress so that it is underneath each as they sleep (don’t forget yourself). By doing this the peas will become “associated” with each family member. I would suggest locating the peas near the corners of the beds as the dried peas sometimes crush if directly slept on. After a week’s time retrieve the peas and string them together with green thread.

Jar Preparation:

On the lid of a glass jar paint/draw the seal of Venus in green.

Paint or draw a green ring around the jar near the center.

After the green paint dries, paint/draw a symbol/sigil to represent each family member (in a color that corresponds to the astrological color of each) along the green line. Let dry.

Putting It Together:

Once the peas and jar are ready, fill the jar with honey and submerge the “necklace” of peas into the honey. Add anything else that will give strength to the working and seal the jar with its lid.

Spell Activation:

On Friday during a Venus hour, light a sweet/flowery smelling tealight candle on top of the jar and take some time to visualize your desired goal (i.e., you and your family members acting in a loving and kind manner toward one another).  At the end of the Venus hour, blow out the candle and preserve the jar in a safe place. Repeat the spell activation whenever needed.

*I wish to thank Robert Hager, author of Doing Magick, for introducing me to this interesting term.